Banning Books For Friends

Earlier today, I was made aware of a great injustice in the world-of all banned books, Steve Weddle’s Country Hardball was not one. He put out this call to correct the issue, and writing a letter to aid his cause was the least I could do. This is that letter.

Texas Education Agency

1701 N. Congress Ave.

Austin, TX 78701

November 17, 2014

Dear TEA,

I recently came across your list of 32 banned and challenged books and I felt the need to write a congratulatory letter. You are taking the first vital steps in protecting our children from the harm of the world. If they were allowed access to books willy-nilly, there’s no telling what bad fates could befall them. They could experience free-thought, fantasies, or, worst of all, become writers. And I know writers, they’re worse than you fear. They drink, they joke, they treat people pretty awesomely (and not the right people), and half of them claim to have murdered hobos.

I was allowed to read whatever I wanted as a child and the harm it caused has followed me my entire life. I’m now a godless heathen in California, of all places, and I spend my own time writing and playing Dungeons and Dragons (or, “the devil’s game”) in the basement of the six bedroom house I own. And fornicating. All the fornicating.

But I digress. The real point of the letter is to point out a book that should be on your radar that you seem to have overlooked. Tyrus Books recently published a novel from one Steve Weddle called Country Hardball, available in places where awesome books are sold. I noticed, on your list, that many of the books dealt with supernatural elements. To make a pun, I think you missed the ball on this one. We know witches, vampires and wizards aren’t real, and so do children. I won’t argue whether or not they should be allowed access, only that there are real and present dangers in this world more worthy of noting.

Country Hardball address a real problem that I don’t think we want our children to face: poverty and economic hardship. We’re a bootstrap-nation, by god, and if we allow our children to contemplate the fact that not every hard worker ends up with a pleasure yatch and a mansion, we’ll have chaos! Anarchy! We may, should they push back enough, have socialism on our hands.

And we know where that end up. Pol Pot.

Country Hardball leads to Pol Pot.

I trust you to do the right thing here. Children should be censored and told what to believe, and taught that anything is possible (leave out the parts about privilege, old money, and the curse of poverty) if they try hard enough! We can’t allow another generation end up like me, angry at the generations before us who have left us with ruins and wealth inequality. We need more ignorance and blind, undying belief in Jesus, Bootstraps, and the Great American Dream.

Do the right thing. Ban Country Hardball immediately.


Kristin Hayworth


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